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I have been asked - Just as a wife stays with her husband's
family, why can't a man stay with his wife's family? Is there scriptural
evidence for role reversal?
Fact is, husbands and wives can stay with parents of either
partner as they wish. There is nothing in the scriptures to force one or
the other opinion. Shri Vishnu married Lakshmiji, daughter of the ocean
and is happily staying in the abode of his father-in-law. Mahadeva married
the daughter of Himalaya and is happily meditating in the realm of his
father-in-law. In fact both of them were already staying in the realm of
their father-in-laws before they married their daughters !! Truly, our
ancients were far more modern than we are!!
Reason men stay with their father is because they stand to
inherit the immovable assets of the father (land, fields, business, house etc).
The son(s) who stay and do seva get the bigger share of the wealth. So
they stay to inherit the maximum they can.
Because daughters go away after marriage, daughters are given
mobile wealth - money, jewellery, cattle etc. They usually do not stay
nearby, but if they do, there is nothing wrong in visiting them. If the
in-laws stay far away, men only visit them during holidays or family functions.
Men usually have business or job and hence need to get back and can't stay long.
Women who are housewives can stay as long as they want. Working women
can't afford to do that and stay for only a short time.
© Bhagwat Shah
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